Friday, February 12, 2010

Please & Thank You.


My child knows a few words. Words like: mama, daddy, bye bye, hi, backpack, bellybutton, puppy, baby, milk. She'll repeat words if you repeat them to her a few times. Unless those words are please and thank you. I'm constantly trying to get Riley to say "please" and "thank you" but she doesn't. I've heard her say "thank you" one time when we were at my parents and I was so excited! I'm not sure what the average vocabulary is for a 14 month old, but according to all these other mothers my child should be saying "please" & "thank you" or at least signing it.

Yesterday at the park I mentioned to a mom that I couldn't get Riley to say it. She proceeded to tell me that her daughter always says "thank you". That made me feel wonderful:) Granted, her daughter is two months older than Riley, so maybe when Riley is 16 months old she'll finally catch on? I can't help but feel like I've failed in some way because my daughter doesn't know how to be polite. When we were in Oregon, I remember being in the kitchen and watching my mother in law try to get Riley to say please. I was slightly embarrassed because I felt like her not being able to say "please" or "thank you" was a reflection on our parenting.

Honestly, its not a big deal that Riley doesn't say "please" and "thank you". It really isn't. But for some reason it bothers me. I think because as parents, we can be so judgmental of each other, and no one likes to be the parent that's under criticism. I have no problem with people passing judgment on the fact that I fed my child formula, or I let her cry it out when she was 5 months old so she'd sleep through the night. It does bother me though when people don't think that Leif & I are teaching Riley how to have good manners and be polite. I'm not sure people really think this, but I still worry about it from time to time. :)

9 comments:

All About Aleigha said...

Just my opinion, but I wouldn't let it bother you to much. Aleigha was around 16 months when she started saying it. She may of been a little older than that. Thank you came first & then she learned please. Dont get discouraged, she'll get it.

Sassily Yours... said...

HI there! Popping in from SITS and I have to tell you, PLEASE don't let anyone make you feel bad about your parenting or your child, even if it was unintentional on their part. Kids develop at different rates so it will come. The only advice I can give is when you are handing her something...hold back and say please. Let her mimic you and when she says it make the biggest deal ever. This will include jumping up and down and saying YAY and throwing her int he air etc... Shell catch on! ;)

And I think that every parent is AMAZING as long as he/she is doing their best. Its rough!

Kelli said...

I think you are doing a great job with Riley and I wouldn't be worried that she is not saying please and thank you. Landyn has said them a few times but only for my mom. :( I've just been saying it to him all the time and hoping it works :)

Hipstercrite said...

Considering how important politeness is to you, I have no doubt that your daughter will be a polite sweetheart. She's just so young now. Just wait!

Patty said...

Don't worry too much she will catch on soon! :-) If you and Leif say it to each other and to her when she gives you stuff it wont be long before she follows.

Mrs. G.I. Joe said...

I know its hard but don't be bothered by that mom's comments. All kids are different. Other babes might not be able to put together big compound words like "backpack" or "bellybutton." If you say please and thank you enough around Riley she'll catch on and say it when she understands it, instead of just mimicking because she thinks she has to. (Which is what a lot of kids seem to do)

Dana said...

People are so small. What do they expect from a little person. Do not let it bother you. You are being the best mom that you can.

Mayra, mommy to Pooh Bear said...

I have enjoyed reading your blog until now. =)


I gave you an award on my blog;

http://mylifeinhigheels.blogspot.com/2010/02/beautiful-blogger-award.html

cul-ture-queen said...

Don't worry she'll pick it up on her own, especially if she hears other people saying it. You can try saying it to her when she brings you something or tries to feed you food.