It hit me the other day that I just might like living in Monterey. I surprised myself when I thought this. For the last almost two years we've been praying that God will make moving possible. To be close to family again. But the last few months I've felt like I should just take advantage of living here while I can because there will be a time when we'll move. Who knows when that'll be, but it'll happen and I know that I'll regret not getting to know Monterey.
Lately I've been feeling overwhelmingly blessed to have the opportunity to live here and to know the people we know. While connecting with people was slower in some ways, God definitely brought people early on that helped the transition. I've been kind of freaking out at the idea of moving again. This has become home, and this is where I've grown up. That sounds odd, but it hit me the other day: Living in Monterey is the first time I've really been on my own. I don't know if people know this but when I was in school, my parents paid for everything. I had a part time job but that was just extra spending money. Then I got married and went from having my parents provide for me to having Leif take on that role. After Riley was born I still heavily relied on Leif and my parents. I drove out to be with my mom a few times a week and would have her come over to help with Riley. Now it seems silly of course but I was a first time mom & newlywed:) When we had to move to Monterey it took a little time for it to sink in that I was for the most part on my own. When it finally hit me I had a hard time. While I struggled, I also began to grow. There were many frustrating conversations with God, and I was jealous of everyone who lived near family. Why didn't I get the luxury to lean on my parents and close friends while I began parenthood.
Its all much clearer now. Most the friends I have who do live near family, had a period in their lives where they were on their own. This is my period + being a wife & raising kids. I remember thinking that when I got married and when we had Riley, I grew up. And I did, in some ways. But not completely. I'm still doing a lot of growing, but thanks to Monterey, I'm learning to be an adult. Today I can honestly thank God for bringing us here. I know for Leif its different, but for me personally I've changed. Coming here has helped me in so many ways... one of those being I believe in myself now. I am in awe at how far God has brought me and what He continues to do. I didn't have answers before but they're becoming more clear everyday, and the timing is as always, perfect. I have a better grasp on who Margaret is and where I want to go... :)
I have a new confidence in myself, but even more so, I have confidence in my Father & His blessings in my life. I am thankful for where we are.
I do have a prayer request (or if you're into good vibes and thoughts please send me some of those!):
The past few months I've been having weird pains where my kidney & ovary are and finally went to the doctor for them. They found a cyst on my ovary (no big deal) and one on my kidney (kind of a big deal). I go in tomorrow for a CT on the kidney cyst. Just pray that although the size isn't normal, it will still be easy for them to go in and just remove it. I am SO happy they figured out what the pain was, and I'm looking forward to finding a solution! Thanks :)
7 comments:
I think Germany might be my Monterey and I am definitely in that struggling time right now. Although I am not a mom yet so it is a little easier thus far. I do miss my family though!
I am glad that you have grown to like Monterey it sounds like it has been a great growing place for you. I hope it continues to treat you well and I will be praying for you and that everything with your kidney will be an easy fix :)
I totally know what you mean. When we moved to Mississippi, I was forced to suddenly be a wife, find a new career, keep a house, support a always-gone husband, and figure out how to make friends in a place where I did not know one person. I thought I had grown up when I went to college but there I had the comfort of already having close friends and being a car ride away from my family. It's amazing what you learn about yourself when you are pushed into a completely new place. I learned that I was much stronger than I ever thought. Sounds like you are too :)
Praying for your CT results. I'm glad they found something and hope they can now find you an easy solution. Remember that the opposite of faith is fear... God will take care of you!
I just got done praying for you lady. You sound so positive and hopeful. I'm glad that you are feeling better. I also had to move to a place that was away from family and very strange to me--Mississippi. At first I hated it and would cried pretty frequently about it but it really grew on me. I've met some wonderful people here and we will be moving in a few short months and I'm actually getting a little sad when I think about it. Living here has taught me a lot about myself and others. The lessons I learned were very valuable to me and I feel that that is what I needed at that point in my life. Isn't it great how God can use even an undesirable situation to bless us? :)
Sending many good vibes (& hugs) your way Monterey Margaret. You're moving forward toward the sun & moon at a Margaret pace--which is the perfect speed for you, Margaret :)
Good luck with your health; I'm sure everything will be fine :)
Wow--my sentiments exactly. I just moved to Monterey a few weeks ago and am actually going through the whole "can we really get into this" phase. We are still packed and in a temporary residence & since we are so far away from family (my family is down south), I have gone through the questioning phase of "WHY, Lord?" But we are here...and with each passing day I am beginning to think we might be able to enjoy ourselves here! Just maybe :-)
I am praying for you about the health.
Praying your doctor appointment and scan went well and that things are okay.
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