Pictures from Saturday.

This past weekend was good. We ate amazing buttermilk pancakes on Saturday & Sunday. I made them from scratch of course. I have the hardest time making things out of a box now that I know I'm very capable of doing it myself. Leif told me he's never going to eat Trader Joes pancakes ever again. I like hearing things like that from him:)

Riley after breakfast on Saturday.

She's obsessed with the new highchair that we just got from a friend as a baby present for Beck. She thinks its hers. I think she enjoys it so much because now she can sit at the table with us, like a big girl.

Waiting for Blaise & Lindsey at Cannery Row

I don't have many pictures of me pregnant so I wanted to take one.

We met up with some friends later on Saturday down at Cannery Row. We had decided to check out this new place they opened that had a mirror maze. At first Leif and I were really skeptical, especially since it was about $10.50 a person. But thankfully, we got in for free:) Thanks to Lindsey and Blaise who work down at Cannery Row. And even if we would have had to pay, it was fun. Riley really enjoyed it.



After the mirror maze we went to Toll House Cookie cafe. Mmm! So good and fun:) We just sat on the couches eating cookies and drinking milk. Its always nice to sit with friends and talk. It kind of reminded me of this coffee house Leif and I go to in Oregon. We just don't have places like that here in California, haha.

Riley sitting with her best friend.

I think they're more fun than Leif and I.

I can't believe that we only have two full weekends left as a family of three!

Little Adventures.

On our way to the park yesterday.

Everyday I try to take Riley somewhere, anywhere. We rarely stay in the house all day. Unlike the first few months of her life. I remember being too scared to go out with Riley by myself. When Leif would come home from work though I'd beg him to take us out. Even though he'd be tired from work he would. Good man:) Of course now I'm not afraid to take Riley out. Although, I think taking a toddler out while being 8 and a half months pregnant might be a little harder than taking out an infant.

Everyday, I look forward to our little adventures as I like to call them. Even if it is just a trip to Target or a stop at McDonalds for french fries. I cherish these times with Riley. Lately its been raining a lot, so we haven't been able to go to the park everyday like we had been doing. That means our adventures are trips to Safeway, Borders and/or the aquarium. I think my favorite so far has been the aquarium because Riley is able to run around, climb things, push buttons, see fish and get wet. And its usually empty so we get the place all to ourselves.

I was taking a break from chasing Riley around.

Riley has been teething. Her 13th tooth just broke through.
She just stood there for a few seconds watching the fish. It was cute.
Her favorite place to have a snack. A clam.

These times are so special to me. Instead of worrying about cleaning the house and what to make for dinner, I get to just enjoy my baby. These are the moments that I keep and remember. These last three weeks before Beck gets here are going to fly by, but I'm savoring every minute alone with Riley. I'll miss when it was just the two of us, but I'm thrilled that Beck will get to join in on our fun:)

Breastfeeding?

Infant Riley

While pregnant with Riley, I read up on breastfeeding as often as I could. Every article I read said that breastfeeding is essentially what every good mother does; formula feeding is only done by selfish and incompetent mothers. I wanted to be a good mother, so I figured, of course I'll breastfeed. When Riley first got here, I tried, but neither of us were enjoying it. I remember thinking after meeting with the lactation consultant everything would work out fine, but it didn't. Riley was always upset and impatient. She kept trying to latch on but could never manage to do it. I remember dreading to feed her one night because it was a battle that I always lost. But I forced myself to keep at it. I started crying when she started screaming because I felt like I was failing her. Leif took Riley, and began feeding her formula. At the same time, he looked at me and said: "Margaret, you don't have to do this. I;ll support you if you choose to give Riley formula. You're not a bad mother". And right then and there I decided to stop attempting to breastfeed, and pumped instead. I pumped for a good 6 weeks before switching Riley to formula completely.

After I made this decision I got a lot of negative reactions from people - comments like "You didn't try hard enough" to "I don't understand why you wouldn't give your child whats best for them". My own mother was upset about my choice to bottlefeed. I remember being at her house and a friend who was pregnant stopped by, and they both questioned me about why I gave Riley formula. They hinted that I didn't try hard enough, that I wasn't patient and was only doing what was easiest. Honestly, I think in some ways breastfeeding is easier than formula feeding. It bothered me that no one listened when I tried to explain and no one cared to support me. I hated when people asked "How long did you breastfeed?" because it was always the same reaction, they always gave me the same look. It was hard for me to understand why people cared so much about how I fed my child. Why couldn't they simply try to be supportive, even if it wasn't something they agreed with?

For awhile I felt guilty. As if I was the worst mother ever. But then I would remember that my child was healthy, that she was growing and developing above and beyond what was expected. I loved feeding her, even if it was from a bottle, and I loved that Leif was able to feed her so I could sleep at night :) Sometimes I'd get up with him and watch him feed his daughter. I cherished those moments. I wouldn't go back and change things. Not at all. I do wish family and friends had been more supportive, but at the end of the day, I knew that my child was being fed what was needed to help her grow and develop, even if it was formula.

Everyone keeps asking if I'll breastfeed this time around. If it goes better than the last time, then yes; but if it doesn't, I'm not going to sweat it - and I'm definitely not going to beat myself up over it. I'm just hoping for the best:)

Being 14 months

Being 14 months is a lot of fun. At least Riley acts as if it is. She spends her days running around laughing at everything and anything. She's been pretending a lot. Sitting up all her stuffed animals and giving them fake food. She likes to hug them, patting their backs as she does it. Leif and I think its time to get her baby doll. Riley is a good mix of girly but not too girly. If that makes sense... She loves necklaces, purses, dolls and doing her hair. But she also likes to wrestle, and anytime she gets hurt, she jumps right back up and keeps on playing. Rarely does running into a wall or hitting her head stop her from whatever she was doing. I think she's going to enjoy having a little brother.

Its interesting how we can tell her to do something and she'll obey us. You ask her to sit on her bottom for snacktime and she'll do it. You can tell her to grab her ball and she'll run over to it and bring it to you. Currently Riley is working on her fake cry. She uses this when we're around other people, or when I tell her no, she'll walk over to daddy and pretend to be upset. I do appreciate that when I tell her "no" or I take something away she is no longer throwing huge tantrums... Sure she'll cry a bit but she gets over it pretty fast. Pretty good kid I have.

Riley has picked up a few words lately. I love when I say something and she attempts to mimic me. Whenever we go to Leif's work she gets excited and says "daddy daddy daddy". Before we even turn into the parking lot she knows and starts smiling the biggest smile. Its probably my favorite part of the day. Yesterday, instead of waiting in the car for Leif, I let Riley run around a bit. As soon as she saw Leif, she squealed and ran towards him. Seriously, nothing is better than that.

The last time I updated on Riley I talked about how she was having separation anxiety. Well now she's not really having separation anxiety. And she has gotten past her fear of strangers. The only time she's upset about being apart is at night. Not every night, but a few nights during the week. We're trying really hard not to give in and let her sleep with us, so on the nights she can't sleep we sit and rock her, then put her in her crib and rub her back a bit. In the beginning it wasn't working that well, but each time it gets a bit easier. Last night I sat with her for about 10 minutes and then laid her in her crib. She cried at first but then snuggled her bear and turned over. I think sometimes she just wants to be close to Leif and I. I love that.

Also, it is now February, which means that Beck will be joining the family pretty soon!